A truly rich man is one whose children run into his arms when his hands are empty. -Unknown

Any man can be a father. It takes someone special to be a dad. ~Unknown

A father carries pictures where his money used to be. ~Unknown

It is much easier to become a father than to be one. ~Kent Nerburn, Letters to My Son: Reflections on Becoming a Man, 1994

The days are long and the years are short. – Unknown
And the one dads have been saying for all time:

It all goes by so fast.

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I hope we can all be inspired by Obama’s message about the importance of dads in the lives of their kids. Some men take their own personal experience and triumph over adversity as an example of how all kids should pull themselves up despite the lack of the same advantages most of us take for granted. I like the fact that Obama speaks plainly about how the pain of going without a present father and that he was lucky to overcome it.   

Obama says prime goal was ‘to be a good father’
President tells East Room audience of his absent dad’s impact

“I decided that if I could be one thing in life, it would be to be a good father,” he told a White House audience, after saying that his father’s decision to walk away from his family had left “a hole in a child’s heart” that couldn’t be filled.

Obama spoke after five men, including a former addict from Baltimore, described their own struggles. The president said there was “no rule that says that you have to repeat your father’s mistakes.”

Adults who were deserted by a parent “have an obligation to break the cycle” and “do better than they did, with your own children,” he said.

[From Obama says prime goal was 'to be a good father' - baltimoresun.com]

Stories like his are often used to teach us a moral lesson that adversity creates greatness. I tend to think greatness evolves despite adversity. While Horatio Alger stories always make better news stories, most people who are “successful” come from homes with supportive, loving and involved parents.

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A recent survey by Jockey brand underwear survey (Insert PR accolades here) names the following dads as intensely viewable in their underwear. This is not me talking, but rather 1000 “people” 18 or over in a random telephone survey. And the winners are:

Brad Pitt – 29%

Matthew McConaughey – 24%

Hug Jackman 16%

Will Smith – 16%

Barack Obama – 13%

The survey also actually queried whether people thought Obama would want boxers, boxer briefs or briefs as a gift for Fathers Day. I won’t titillate you with what style underwear most Americans fantasize our president wears.

I actually don’t recall getting the nomination form for this survey, which may explain why the list is so full of “non-surprises.” I gotta say, though, that since Bill Clinton, made the question “boxers or briefs” so important to the country’s future, I really don’t want to ponder Mr. Obama in anything other than a blue suit and rep tie.

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TREAT HER LIKE YOUR BOSS

No matter how tired or fed up you are with how things are going at the office or store or school, or wherever you might work, if the person who signs your paycheck walks in, somehow there is a little reserve of goodwill saved up, just for him or her.

From out of thin air comes a smile or a sudden lilt in the voice, or a very optimistic assessment of the absolute disaster staring everyone in the face. This good-natured version of you is like a can of emergency survival instinct, always there somewhere, just waiting to be used.

This is the source to which you might consider turning when you are completely fed up with your daughter, when she has found your last nerve and is standing on it, when you realize you have memorized the phone number of the private military academy over in the next county.

But instead of raising your voice to her, instead of saying some things you may regret later, instead of reminding her that you brought her into this world, instead of embarrassing her in front of the entire family, even though that is precisely what she deserves, just imagine . . .
What would you do if your boss suddenly walked into the room? Hmmm. Would you pull him by the earlobe? Would you stick your finger in his face and hiss like a snake? Would you ask him the same question over and over? Would you ask him the same question over and over? Would you call him a name? Would you call him by his full name in a loud voice with lots of extra pronunciation on all the consonants?

Probably not. Not if you wanted to keep your job.

To your boss you would show complete respect and consideration. To your boss you would give the benefit of the doubt. There is no concession you could not make, and no compromise that could not be reached.

Your daughter should get the same respect, if not more. Why not let her meet the kind and considerate you hiding there behind the angry and frustrated version? Why not introduce her to the resilient spirit who always finds a reason to laugh at a situation, regardless of how dire?

Let her say hello to the forgiving optimist who makes a self- deprecating remark to lighten the mood, and makes the whole room laugh. Let her hang out with the practical gamer who always finds a way to look at the bright side of things.

Treat her like your boss.
Excerpt from Parking Lot Rules & 75 Other Ideas for Raising Amazing Children by Tom Sturges

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Someone may have recommended this book to you, or you may even get it for Fathers Day:
Reading with Dad.

A Great Father’s Day Gift for a Dad Who Reads to His Kids

Tuesday June 9, 2009
If you are looking for a Father’s Day gift for a dad who has always enjoyed reading books to his kids, I highly recommend Reading With Dad. While written in verse and designed in picture book format, this is a gift book for adults rather than a children’s book. The text by Richard Jorgensen and the loving illustrations by Warren Hanson celebrate the love between a father and a daughter that is experienced through the act of reading together. Beginning with the father reading to his young daughter, the book continues through her growing up years to the daughter reading aloud to her own children while still continuing to read with her dad. The book ends with her reminiscing,

[From A Great Father's Day Gift for a Dad Who Reads to His Kids]

Here’s my review of it:

My daughter got Reading with Dad and as the dad who had to read it to her, I’d have to say that I disagree with this review. The book is written in sing-songy verse and ends with dad dying and the reading of a biblical verse. If you want to spend 15 minutes thinking of how it will feel to watch your child grow up while you get old and die (while reading bad poetry), be my guest. Most of us prefer something more uplifting.

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Here are some unconventional ideas for the green dad on your list. For some dads, of course, a home improvement gift is a bit like getting a mixer for mom’s day, but, just like a primo Kitchen Aid mixer is a great gift for a baking mom, these gifts can be killer choices for dads who love to tinker and save.

Here’s a cool toy for the energy sleuth on your list:
Kill a Watt Electricity Monitor. Monitoring systems for gauging energy use usually require pro installation, but this small device lets you see the effect of plugging in and unplugging appliances right away. A small LCD screen shows you electricity usage, cost, and projections over weeks, month and year so you can decide if it’s time to upgrade that old fridge.

One thing you might find in your sleuthing is that many “always on” appliances are eating significant amounts of juice. Now there are a number of power strips on the market that turn these off on a Timer. Of course, you don’t want your Tivo or your clock radio off at 3 AM, but maybe your living room receiver or rec room TV. Consider the GE Power Strip Timer. $20 on Amazon.

The Eyemax WB radio receives AM, FM, and the US/Canada Weather Band, and acts as a speaker system for your iPod/MP3 player. It has both a solar panel and the ability to power it yourself when needed. It also includes an integrated LED flashlight. The Eyemax WB 2009 is a radio that you and your family can depend on, anytime, anywhere, any weather. Freeplay Solar Radio Eyemax Weather Band • $80.00 at www.SustainStores.com.

A truly easy, convenient way to compost. Just place your organic waste in the drum, spin every so often, and soon you have amazingly rich and garden-growing compost. A perfect choice for those not interested in an open compost pile–more discreet and no smell. The Envirocycle produces two excellent compost fertilizers, both solid and liquid. Comes with complete instructions. This item ships directly from the manufacturer via Standard Ground Shipping only. Envirocycle Composter • $140There is an additional shipping and handling charge of $30.00 at www.SustainStores.com.

Just let the worms do their work in their Worm Farm inside or outside and at the bottom you’ll get worm tea, perfect for enriching the soil of your garden and create super-growing plants. Use Red Wiggler Worms, which are not included. First fill your Worm Farm with bedding: leaves, shredded paper and dirt, for example. After the worms have moved in, start feeding them you all your organic kitchen waste like coffee grounds, leafy green trimmings and eggshells. Soon you’ll have worm castings (otherwise known as “black gold” for gardens) in the bottom of the bin. Collect, and watch your plants act like they’re on steroids, completely naturally. Lid keeps worms covered, maintaining the dry bedding they thrive in, yet roof is ventilated for worm comfort. High Strength. 4 Trays. Made from recycled material. This item ships directly from the manufacturer via Standard Ground Shipping only. Guasanito 4-Tray Worm Composter • $68.95 at www.SustainStores.com

For other green dad gift ideas, check out www.SustainStores.com. Use discount code “sustain” in the keycode section of the checkout form for a 20% discount off everything (the discount will be confirmed in an email after the order is processed.) This code expires June 21, Father’s Day.

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Father’s Day, or any holiday doesn’t need to be another reason to spend a lot of money shopping for stuff just so you have a package to wrap. In fact, most dads just want to feel appreciated on Father’s Day and that doesn’t even mean a $3 Hallmark card. The following ideas are guaranteed to make dad feel special on this one day of the year.

1. Most dads want to spend Father’s Day with family, but some dads just need a break from the weekend routine. If that’s the dad in your life, help him plan a little getaway before you all get reunited as a family. If he likes to go fishing, tell him to go and you’ll have a big lunch waiting when he gets back. What dad doesn’t want to be told that it would be great if he got out of the house to play some golf, knowing that a barbecue will be set up and nice cold beer waiting when he gets back. Top it off by telling him to invite his friends, so they can see how much he’s treasured as a dad.

2. What Father’s Day (or Mother’s Day) list wouldn’t include Breakfast in Bed. This is a particularly good idea if you have small kids since most of the charm of breakfast in bed is getting served by very small attendants. Later on, an old-fashioned pancakes and bacon breakfast, especially if that’s a rare thing in a busy household, is a good treat.

3. Give dad a bell to be rung to get all his wishes fulfilled on father’s day. Be forewarned to make up a list of acceptable and finite wishes or you’ll regret this gift after about twenty minutes. Let the list include three hot beverages, three cold beverages, 10 hugs, 3 requests for printed material or the remote, and any other of your dad’s favorites. What you add is up to you.

4. Make a slide show, movie or just ordinary photo collection of dad and the kids together. Psychologists say that people who surround themselves with reminders of happy times are both happier and healthier. Find photos with happy associations, which should be just about any photo before the teenage years.

5. Bake a pie, make cookies, fry him a bacon. It’s not for nothing that they say the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. Knowing what he likes and making it for him can be one of the best presents for a dad to indulge in. Especially if you reassure him that having a big meal today can be balanced with going back to the salad diet tomorrow.

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1. If you have the only dad in America without an iPod, the choice is easy.

2. If the dad in your life travels like a maniac, the Kindle probably should be on his list since he’s going to find himself on a trip somewhere with no magazine and no internet connection one day. The Kindle packs all that in a small package he can keep at the bottom of his carry-on. The only drawback, other than the price, is that right now the mindless airlines treat it as an electronic device and make you shut it down during take-off and landing, which kind of defeats the purpose.

3. The Tray-Bien – I’m a Francophile and am not in love with the name of this gizmo, but I do think it’s very useful if you have the discipline to use it. The Tray Bien is a black sleeve that fits over the tray table creating your own set of pockets including a bottle holder This may seem like a goofy idea, but after I left an ipod in the front seat pocket on my last flight of the day, I see the value. Just remove from seat back, fold and stick in your bag when you’re done. It is another thing to carry, but I always bring mine along now, especially when I’m with the kids since that’s when it’s easiest to get distracted and lose your brand new ipod because someone needs to go to the bathroom RIGHT NOW (grumble, grumble). NOTE: the Tray Bien is useless on business class seats so skip this if your dad is a high flyer. Invented by a mom and available from SarahBelli.com. $39.95

4. A new head pillow. And while you’re at it, rather than just getting the traditional donut shape, take a gander at the TravelRest Travel Pillow from Hi-Gear Design. It is fatter on one end for your head, and narrower at the other to help support the body.

5. Bialetti espresso pot -Okay, he’s not going to get this into his carry-on, but if your dad needs an espresso to get going and lug the full-size Astra to your weekend getaway, this updated version of the classic espresso maker might be the next best thing. Can 50 Million Italians be wrong? $45 on Amazon.

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Face it. The year is 2009 and every dad is a geeky dad because you no longer have to use a slide ruler to be one. Technology is super-accessible, but it’s key to find dad gadgets that are truly easy to use.

By now, every list contains an iPod, but how many of these little babies can you own. Sadly, they aren’t evolving fast enough to require a new one every year. If you have a dad who has an iPod and can’t get enough music, an iTunes gift card is a nice touch. Still, it says, “I know you so little, all I could do was give you some money,” which is certainly not a good sentiment to write in a card. And, for some beleaguered dads, a gift card of any sort is just another chunk of plastic to fatten his wallet and remind him of yet another task undone. Consider instead, making an iTunes music mix for him of music you think he’d like based on his music tastes and new directions you could imagine his tastes going. Most of us get stuck in a musical rut we dug deep while in our ’20s. It’s not that we don’t want to hear new things, but we lack the energy to go find one. Now, if only we had someone who knew us so well that THEY could find the music…!

If your dad uses the computer a lot, a perfect gift is an extra computer monitor so he can look like one of those stock traders you see while scanning past the Bloomberg channel. An additional monitor makes it easy to scatter documents, apps, and extra ideas across your virtual desktop, just as you do on your real one. I know there are state of the art monitors (everyone loves the “24 Apple at $900), but I really like my
ViewSonic “22 inch ViewDock monitor because it comes with an iPod dock (not iPhone unfortunately), stereo speakers, a headphone jack and mic input, and three powered USB ports. $449 on Amazon.

If the dad on your list is a serious Wii player, here’s a new Nintendo device to to improve the motion sensitivity of the Remote. Called
MotionPlus, this small plug attaches to the end of the Remote. This add-on is brand new and might be a very welcome surprise to the virtual tennis player in your family. $19.95 at Amazon.

Here’s a spin on the old Fathers Day chestnut, the photo mug, which is itself a spin on the “Worlds Best Dad” mug. Now there’s a
Digi-Mug, a coffee mug that actually shows 45 coor photos on a removable screen. $30 on Amazon.

If your tech dad already has programmed a Roomba to avoid sweeping the kitchen and vacuuming the living room, maybe it’s time to move up to an
The Looj. The Looj is a handheld remote that climbs on the roof to clean the gutters so he doesn’t have to. $129.

All unique ideas, some of which even the geekiest guy probably hasn’t even heard of yet.

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