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Decoding What a Man Says

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Women always complain that men are difficult to understand. Here are some funny explanations of typical guy phrases.

It's a guy thing
Translated: "There is no rational thought pattern connected with it, and you have no chance at all of making it logical."

Can I help with dinner?
Translated: "Why isn't it already on the table?"

Uh Huh, Sure Honey OR Yes Dear
Translated: Absolutely nothing. It's a conditioned response.

It would take too long to explain
Translated: "I have no idea how it works."

I was listening to you. It's just that I have things on my mind
Translated: "That girl standing on the corner is a real babe."

Take a break honey, you're working too hard
Translated: "I can't hear the game over the vacuum cleaner."

That's interesting dear
Translated: "Are you still talking?"

You know how bad my memory is
Translated: "I remember the theme song to 'F Troop', the address of the first girl I ever kissed, and the vehicle identification numbers of every car I've ever owned, but I forgot our anniversary."

I was just thinking about you and got you these roses
Translated: "The girl selling them on the corner was a real babe."

Oh, don't fuss - I just cut myself, it's no big deal
Translated: "I have actually severed a limb, but will bleed to death before I admit that I'm hurt."

I can't find it
Translated: "It didn't fall into my outstretched hands, so I'm completely clueless."

What did I do this time?
Translated: "What did you catch me at?"

I heard you
Translated: "I haven't the foggiest clue what you just said, and am hoping desperately that I can fake it well enough so that you don't spend the next three days yelling at me."

You know I could never love anyone else
Translated: "I am used to the way you yell at me, and realize it could be worse."

You look terrific
Translated: "Oh, please don't try on one more outfit, I'm starving."

I'm not lost. I know exactly where we are
Translated: "No one will ever see us alive again."

This article was sent to GreatDad.com in an email without attribution. If this is your content, please let us know so we can post the source or remove it if necessary. Thanks.
 

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