Returning User? Login Here | Bookmark this site | Contests | Sitemap


Web GreatDad.com

Favorites

Tell a Friend

Subscribe via RSS

Enter your email

RSS Feed

XML Sitemap

greatdad/sitemap

We Recommend > Contributors > Armin Brott

Tips for the Military Father

Be the first to rate this article:

By Armin Brott

Print

Q: I'm in the military and I'm going to be sent overseas for at least a year. The problem is that my wife is pregnant and due to deliver right about the time I'm supposed to ship out. I can probably finagle things so that I'll be here for the birth of our child, but the year abroad is unavoidable. What kinds of things can I do to try and bond with our infant early on, before I am deployed overseas? Equally important, are there things I can do to try and maintain a bond with such a young baby while I'm away?

A: What terrible timing.

Try to spend every second you can with your baby before you have to ship out. You don't need to plan any special activities with newborns-holding, changing, bottle-feeding (either formula or breast milk), reading to her, taking her out for walks, etc.--the most mundane and basic stuff but that's what relationships are based on.

As far as staying involved while you're gone, your baby will be so young that he or she won't remember you when you get back. So be prepared to ease in slowly. 12 months of age is prime time for stranger anxiety (when babies get scared around people they don't know well and/or afraid to be left with strangers. Unfortunately, in your baby's mind, you'll fit into that category).

That being said, the more your wife can do to make you part of the baby's life while you're gone, the better. If she can talk about you, tell the baby stories, show the baby pictures of you, etc. that will help. The baby won't understand a lot of this but at least he or she will get used to hearing about "daddy."

Before you go, it would be great if you could make some tapes of yourself reading a few children's stories so your wife can play them to the baby while you're gone. That will help the baby get used to your voice. All these things will make getting back together a little easier.

And whatever you do, don't forget about your wife. She needs to know not only that you miss her, but that you're really looking forward to being a dad and that you want to be as involved as you can.

– Armin Brott

A great dad himself, Armin speaks not only as a specialist in parenting, but as a parent himself. He has written several books including The Expectant Father and Fathering Your Toddler.

Subscribe to the pregnancy newsletter or 4-8 year olds newsletter.

Email this | Print

Login with Facebook

	Comments
	By kelly, From colorado springs i am 6wks prego my husband just left for 9 months and we have been trying for over a year to get prego and now he doesnt seam to be happy what can i do to make him realize we are finally going to have a baby

Post a Comment


First Name:
City:
Email Address:
Comments:	Total Words: (400 words*)
	Enter the characters you see in the image. They are case sensitive.

Shopping

Article List

	How can I be competent as a dad?
	Supporting the Stay-at-Home Father
	Why Medical Checkups are Important for Men
	How to Stay in Touch with Children After They Leave Home
	Avoiding Gender Stereotypes
	Tips for the Military Father
	Can Fathers be Responsible Parents?
	Are Fathers Biologically Inferior Parents?
	How to Help Stepmom Adapt to Her New Role
	When Your Teenager Turns to Crime
	Your Child's First Day of School
	How Fatherhood Has Changed You
	The Meaning of Fatherhood

All section articles

1 2 3 4

Forum Topics

Hay Posts: 0 Views: 18 Tory burch outlet florida the most significant offenders am Posts: 0 Views: 17 New User: Im so isolated! Posts: 0 Views: 24 Gifts for Children's Day Posts: 0 Views: 15 New father-to-be, general discussion with others Posts: 0 Views: 36

More Forum

Local Guides

All Guides
Alabama
Alaska
Arizona
Arkansas
California
Colorado
Connecticut
DC
Delaware
Florida
Georgia
Hawaii
Idaho
Illinois
Indiana
Iowa
Kansas
Kentucky
Louisiana
Maine
Maryland
Massachusetts
Michigan
Minnesota
Mississippi
Missouri
Montana
Nebraska
Nevada
New Hampshire
New Jersey
New Mexico
New York
North Carolina
North Dakota
Ohio
Oklahoma
Oregon
Pennsylvania
Rhode Island
South Carolina
South Dakota
Tennessee
Texas
Utah
Vermont
Virginia
Washington
West Virginia
Wisconsin
Wyoming