Understanding Stress and Resilience with Andrew O’Brien

Today, we’re diving deep into the connection between stress and resilience with our special guest, Andrew O’Brien. Whether you’re dealing with everyday stress or feeling chronically overwhelmed, this episode is packed with actionable tips to help you navigate life more resiliently.

In this episode, you will be able to:

1. Understand the crucial link between chronic stress and building resilience, and why managing stress proactively is essential.
2. Identify physical and emotional signs of chronic stress, from eyelid twitches to anxiety and depression.
3. Learn the difference between motivating “good stress” and harmful “bad stress,” and the importance of a healthy stress response.
4. Discover effective strategies like deep breathing and emotional expression methods such as journaling to manage stress.
5. Embrace self-compassion during stressful times by being kind to yourself and altering negative self-talk to improve mental resilience.

Hi there, it’s Paul Banas from Great Dad Talks, and I couldn’t be more excited to share with you some key insights from our recent podcast episode. This week, I had the pleasure of hosting Andrew O’Brien, a coach specializing in stress management and resilience. Andrew shared some truly eye-opening perspectives and practical advice that I think every dad can benefit from.

Stress and Resilience: Why It Matters

We all know that stress and resilience are interconnected. Feeling stressed is often a warning sign that we need to pay attention to our resilience levels. But how do we understand this connection better, and more importantly, how can we manage stress effectively to boost our resilience? Andrew dove deep into these questions, and here’s a breakdown of what we discussed.

Andrew O’Brien’s Journey with Stress

Andrew started by sharing his personal journey, which many of us can relate to:

> “I spent a lot of my life struggling with feeling chronically stressed, feeling that burnout. It translated into all sorts of different physical stress symptoms, emotional stress symptoms. And it really came to a boiling point about three or four years ago.”

This was a turning point for Andrew, compelling him to compile various bits of science and techniques to manage stress effectively.

Recognizing Stress Symptoms

When it comes to identifying dangerous levels of stress, Andrew highlighted several symptoms:

Physical Symptoms:

• Eyelid twitching
• GI issues including hemorrhoids
• Headaches
• Skin rashes
• Ongoing stomach distress

Emotional Symptoms:

• Depression
• Anxiety
• General feelings of being down without clinical depression

Good Stress vs. Bad Stress

Is there such a thing as “good stress”? Andrew believes so.

> “I do believe that there is absolutely good stress. We are human. As humans, we have a stress response system, and that system is innate to us.”

He pointed out that good stress can motivate us, whether it’s preparing for a big career move or an upcoming wedding. However, it’s crucial to manage this stress so it doesn’t turn into the chronic kind.

Tips for Managing Stress

We also delved into practical ways to manage stress. Andrew outlined several tips that can make a significant difference:

1. Deep Breathing

> “Our brains use about 20% of our total body’s oxygen supply. If we’re not fueling our entire bodies with deep breaths, our amazing brains are not getting what it’s craving.”

Key Advice:

• Practice deep, conscious breathing throughout the day.
• Explore different breathing techniques to find one that resonates with you.

2. Emotional Expression

> “If we are not actively acknowledging what we’re feeling and then releasing those emotions in healthy ways, we’re basically holding it inside.”

Key Advice:

• Journaling your feelings, especially the tough ones like anger or shame.
• Talking to inanimate objects or engaging in other creative outlets like poetry, dance, or painting.
• Recognize and embrace all emotions as part of the human condition.

The Role of Self-Compassion

Lastly, we touched on the importance of self-compassion in dealing with stress:

> “Being kind to yourself. What might you be telling yourself that you might not be conscious of? 95% of our mind is subconscious.”

Key Advice:

• Monitor your self-talk and work to replace negative thoughts with kinder, more supportive ones.
• Practice acceptance and acknowledge that stress is a part of the human condition.
• Ask yourself if the stressor will matter in five years to gain perspective.

Conclusion

Our discussion with Andrew O’Brien highlighted that managing stress effectively is not just about reducing immediate discomfort but building long-term resilience. If you’re interested in diving deeper, Andrew offers a free 45-minute discovery session and has a wealth of resources, including a guide on 10 evidence-based ways to live without chronic stress, available on his website, themindblowingcoach.com