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Bullies and schools in the New York Times

March 26, 2008 by Paul Banas Leave a Comment

There’s a sad story in today’s paper (A Boy the Bullies Love to Beat Up, Repeatedly – New York Times) about a kid 15 years old and his repeated experience with bullies in the school. I found the story to be triply tragic because the school has done little to stop harassment and physical violence over years and years, and also that the best solution is to suggest to the parents that they move out of the school district. This district in Fayetteville appears to be a modern day Lord of the Flies community where the weak suffer along at the pleasure of the big and strong, authority is neglected and parents are completely absent. At some level, I can understand the problem with kids and unbridled torture of those smaller and weaker. Kids are more primal, and while I don’t believe that man is born evil, we can all agree that some kids need boundaries and discipline or they will hurt others or themselves.


 


Unfortunately, in this case, the authorities seem to be turning a blind eye.


 


A quick look around the web tends to throw the blame at the victim. To avoid bullying, people say, “sit in the front of the bus,” or “stay out of empty bathrooms.” Kids probably instinctively know to do these things anyway. While some tips are helpful, bullying really is a community issue. The more we blame the children who are bullied because they talk differently, or “don’t belong,” or don’t fit in, the more we are sending the message that this behavior can be tolerated.



 – Paul Banas

Filed Under: GreatDad Blog, Kids

About Paul Banas

Paul Banas is happy married dad of two great kids living in San Francisco. He writes now about kids, new technology and how the two interact for GreatDad.com and for Pregnancy Magazine (pregnancymagazine.com) where he is also the publisher.

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Great Dad Talks is a series of conversations with experts on all aspects of the family adventure. With the perspective that “dads don’t always think like moms,” our mission is to support dad voices and our slightly different approaches to parenting. We’ll try to find solutions to every day challenges like getting kids off the couch and making STEM classes available for both boys and girls. But we’ll also tackle bigger issues when they come. The one main theme will be to support dads in the most important role of their lives that of being a great dad. Connect with us at greatdad.com and watch the video version of these podcasts at YouTube.com/greatdadnews

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Today we delve into the complexities of fatherhood with David Marcus, Ph.D., an expert with over forty years of experience working with families and children. In this enlightening conversation, we explore the essential components of communicating with your child, focusing on the development of a common emotional language. Learn about the four assumptions of emotionality that parents often make and discover strategies to foster a safe and open environment for meaningful conversations at any age.

Check out Dr. Marcus’ website at parentrx.org

Visit these links and embark on the path to becoming the best parent you can be:

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