Top 3 ways to put off the birds and the bees talk

After a long winter spent shoveling the driveway, jamming your children into their ill-fitting snow boots and scouring through gloves until you can find a mismatched pair that fits your kids, the joys of spring are sure to put you at ease and give you something to look forward to.

With baseball season now underway, you have an excuse to drink a few beers on at least 162 nights during the next six months.

While school is still in session for another few months, the warm weather might give you a reason to play hookey every once and awhile, without having to explain to your kids why daddy is wearing a Hawaiian shirt and sipping a piña colada on the couch at 11 a.m. on a Wednesday.

Not to mention, spring is the season when you can go golfing and call it a "business opportunity."

But don’t forget, as the days get longer and the mercury rises, nature assumes a more sensual rhythm. Flowers open, birds sing, bees emerge – and wool jackets are stripped in favor of bare shoulders and short skirts.

Yes, spring is the season of the birds and the bees. And even if there’s not a new birth in the family, some curious (and observant) children are likely to catch a whiff of the pheromones in the air, see baby animals appearing in the yard, or spot the neighborhood dogs getting down, and start asking questions.

Here are three responses to "Where do babies come from?" that you can tell your kids to avoid having the "birds and bees" talk this spring.

1. "Ask your mother"

2. "Europe"

3. "It’s Wednesday, make me a piña colada.