• Skip to main content
  • Skip to secondary menu
  • Skip to primary sidebar

Because dads don’t always think like moms™

  • Dad
    • Celebrities
    • Gay Dads
    • Sex
    • Single Dads
  • Pregnancy
    • Labor or Delivery
    • Pregnant Wife
  • Baby
    • Baby Naming
    • Feeding
    • Sleep
    • Toilet Training
  • Kids
  • Teens
  • Activities
    • Local
    • By Age
    • Movie Reviews
    • Celebrations
  • Toys
    • We Recommend
    • Toys
  • Coaching for Dads
  • Great Dad Talks Podcast
You are here: Home / Dad News / 3 Things I Wish I Knew in the Delivery Room

3 Things I Wish I Knew in the Delivery Room

August 18, 2014 by GreatDad Writers Leave a Comment

Dads to be. Listen up because I’m about to drop knowledge on you that no one told me. My only hope is that you embrace this truth and hold it close. It could save your life.

Before I begin, you should know the following. Every birth is different. Some women get C-sections. Some women have natural births. Some women have children in public places. I can only tell you about my experience and what I learned. To do that, you need to know the following: my wife got an epidural, the labor was about six hours long and we were in a hospital.

1. There Will be Blood (and Poop)
I know you know where babies come from, but what you don’t know is HOW they come into this world. There is pushing and yelling and poking. And before the head even makes an appearance, there is blood.

Keep this in perspective. A woman is pushing out a 4 to 8 pound human out of their body. There will be tearing and blood will be everywhere. EVERY. WHERE. Also, since an epidural numbs a woman’s body to some of the pain (yes, the operative word here is some), it’s also possible for her to push other things out in the meantime.

Pro Tip: If she asks you if she pooped lie, and say no. You also have to look so she believes that you are actually checking. Just say everything is fine.

2. Don’t Cross the Birth Barrier and Look “Down There”
Picture this. The woman you love is on her back and breathing hard because she just pushed your massive child out of her body. She tells you to run over to the baby to take pictures of their first moment in the world. In order to do this, you have to walk around the bed and in front of her.

Do not, under any circumstances, look into the actual birth area. Just don’t. And I realize that by saying this I’m only heightening your curiosity, making you to want to look even more. Fine, go ahead. Be aware that it will be a war zone and you may not recover from the image you see.

“But is it really that bad?”

Yes friend. It is.

“C’mon man. really?”

You want to know what it’s like? Remember that time you felt really constipated and you ended up on the toilet for like an hour? Multiple that by a million with a side of getting kicked in the junk. And now you’re bleeding everywhere and someone is hunched over stitching you up. That’s what it’s like.

3. Take video. No, not of the birth.
You may be wondering why I’m advising against a birth video. Those memories are better played back in your mind, mainly because your brain is smart enough to sanitize it for you. You don’t need video footage of that moment. You have to be present, looking into your wife’s eyes and be close enough so she can punch you in the face when she needs to. And she will.

No, I’m talking about a video of your baby’s first cry, of how your wife sounds when she first holds her child and of how you look when you touch your first born’s toes. While I have these moments as images, I kind of wish I had a video of them too.

Your go-to will be to take a million pictures, but try to take some video too.

Filed Under: Dad News, Father

Reader Interactions

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

You must be logged in to post a comment.

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Primary Sidebar

Great Dad Talks

Great Dad Talks
Great Dad Talks

Great Dad Talks is a series of conversations with experts on all aspects of the family adventure. With the perspective that “dads don’t always think like moms,” our mission is to support dad voices and our slightly different approaches to parenting. We’ll try to find solutions to every day challenges like getting kids off the couch and making STEM classes available for both boys and girls. But we’ll also tackle bigger issues when they come. The one main theme will be to support dads in the most important role of their lives that of being a great dad. Connect with us at greatdad.com and watch the video version of these podcasts at YouTube.com/greatdadnews

150. The Power of Humor in Parenting with Gavin Bellour
byPaul Banas

How does humor shape a happy family? In this episode of Great Dad Talks, explore the power of laughter in parenting with director, creative, and dad of four, Gavin Bellour. Gavin shares stories from both his advertising career—featuring celebrities like Jason Biggs, Martha Stewart, and Norm Macdonald—and his life as a father trying to find joy, even amid chaos.

From embracing dad jokes to making humor an essential family value, we discuss the challenges and hilarity of parenthood. We cover playful family rituals, the importance of laughing at yourself, and practical tips on bringing more humor—and less stress—into your home.

Check out Gavin’s website at www.gavinbellour.com

Visit these links and embark on the path to becoming the best parent you can be:

– GreatDad.com/coaching 

– GreatDad.com/pq 

– Gratitude course: bit.ly/3NMLDNC  

50% off for podcast listeners with code PODCAST50

150. The Power of Humor in Parenting with Gavin Bellour
150. The Power of Humor in Parenting with Gavin Bellour
June 17, 2025
Paul Banas
149. Winning College Applications with Hamada Zahawi
June 10, 2025
Paul Banas
148. Healing Generational Trauma with Dr. Sasha Reiisi
June 3, 2025
Paul Banas
147. Discovering Dad’s Purpose with Adam Landrum
May 27, 2025
Paul Banas
146. Balancing Business and Family with Dr. Travis Parry
May 20, 2025
Paul Banas
145. Understanding Children’s Emotional Needs with Dr. David Marcus
May 13, 2025
Paul Banas
144. Exploring Mindful Fatherhood with Odeani Mc Bean
May 6, 2025
Paul Banas
143. Overcoming Dad Burnout with Scott Anderson
April 29, 2025
Paul Banas
142. Building Resilient Kids with Dr. Richard Oelberger
April 24, 2025
Paul Banas
141. Exploring Men’s Sexual Health with Dr. Elliot Justin
April 22, 2025
Paul Banas
Search Results placeholder

More to See

Father’s Day 2025: The Best Grilling Tools and Accessories for Dad

May 31, 2025 By Paul Banas

Balancing Business and Family with Dr. Travis Parry

May 20, 2025 By Paul Banas

Copyright © 2025 . GreatDad