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Adopting an Older Child

April 22, 2008 by GreatDad Writers 1 Comment

Adoption is increasingly becoming an option for many parents. While it is a popular choice for single parents and same-sex couples who want to raise children, many opposite-sex couples are also making an active choice for adoption of older children.

 

Bringing home an older adopted child for the first time requires care. The first few weeks, especially, are crucial. Your approach during this time will significantly impact the relationship your adopted child will share with his or her new family. Here are some tips to help you:

  • Prepare your children in advance: If you already have children, it is important that you talk to them about the new arrival in advance. Prepare them on how they should interact with the adopted child.
  • Assert your role as parent: Establish your role as the parent right from day one. While this may seem difficult, it is important that you combine love with firmness and lay down rules for your child to follow. This is especially important with older kids.
  • Distribute chores and duties: Participating in household chores and duties will help your adopted child integrate with your family. It will also help prevent any resentment in your children.
  • Adapt to your adopted child’s needs: Many older children who have been placed in foster care may have a history of neglect or abuse and may be averse to display of intimacy or touch. It is important that you respond sensitively to your adopted child’s needs by finding other ways to interact.
  • Help your adopted child explain himself to peers: Adopted children are often at a loss to explain their relationship with their foster family to friends and peers. Telling the truth may attract unnecessary attention or even teasing or bullying. Help your adopted child know exactly how much of the truth to reveal.

 

Filed Under: Kids

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  1. Marie says

    November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    I would like to adopot kids and rise them asmy own.

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Great Dad Talks is a series of conversations with experts on all aspects of the family adventure. With the perspective that “dads don’t always think like moms,” our mission is to support dad voices and our slightly different approaches to parenting. We’ll try to find solutions to every day challenges like getting kids off the couch and making STEM classes available for both boys and girls. But we’ll also tackle bigger issues when they come. The one main theme will be to support dads in the most important role of their lives that of being a great dad. Connect with us at greatdad.com and watch the video version of these podcasts at YouTube.com/greatdadnews

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