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Resolving conflicts during Playdates

January 19, 2007 by GreatDad Writers Leave a Comment


  • Lay down the “house rules:” Situations will undoubtedly arise that require you to correct your visitor’s behavior. Rather than simply reprimanding him, says Wilford, remember that the rules may be different in his house and that he needs to understand the reasoning behind your requests. Instead of saying, “Don’t eat in there!” for instance, say, “We only eat in the kitchen at our house.” If he’s running down the stairs, say “Those stairs are slippery, so please walk carefully on them.” This cuts down on the reprimands while still keeping the kids in line

  • Let kids work out their own problems: If the children don’t see eye-to-eye on something, resist the urge jump in right away. Small disagreements seldom last long, and if you hang back you’ll often find that the kids work out their own resolution

  • Intervene rarely, but firmly: If, however, a conflict is escalating into put-downs or physical confrontation, it’s time to step in. Remain calm and make firm statements like, “I can’t let you do that to Natalie.” Remind both parties that words and actions that hurt are not acceptable, and then coach the kids on coming up with a compromise to the original problem. If the fighting continues, separate the children for a while or introduce a new activity that’s less likely to cause conflict.

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Great Dad Talks is a series of conversations with experts on all aspects of the family adventure. With the perspective that “dads don’t always think like moms,” our mission is to support dad voices and our slightly different approaches to parenting. We’ll try to find solutions to every day challenges like getting kids off the couch and making STEM classes available for both boys and girls. But we’ll also tackle bigger issues when they come. The one main theme will be to support dads in the most important role of their lives that of being a great dad. Connect with us at greatdad.com and watch the video version of these podcasts at YouTube.com/greatdadnews

145. Understanding Children’s Emotional Needs with Dr. David Marcus
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Today we delve into the complexities of fatherhood with David Marcus, Ph.D., an expert with over forty years of experience working with families and children. In this enlightening conversation, we explore the essential components of communicating with your child, focusing on the development of a common emotional language. Learn about the four assumptions of emotionality that parents often make and discover strategies to foster a safe and open environment for meaningful conversations at any age.

Check out Dr. Marcus’ website at parentrx.org

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– GreatDad.com/pq 

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