- Keep your cool: If you lose your temper, you’re playing right your kids’ hands. Instead, calmly and matter-of-factly remind them that certain words are off-limits.
- Be specific: “Don’t ever use language like that!” doesn’t work as well as something more precise, such as “We don’t use that word in this house,” or “That’s an offensive word; please don’t use it where others have to listen to it.”
- Invoke consequences: If your child won’t stop the salty talk even after being warned, then it’s time for disciplinary tactics. Stay calm and respond swiftly: “Saying that word means you can’t watch any television today.”
- Suggest alternatives: Explain to your grade-schooler that instead of swearing when he’s mad, he could punch a pillow
- Establish house rules about swearing — and follow them yourself: Barring gutter talk from your child won’t hold up if every other word you utter during a phone conversation turns the air blue.
- Look for signs of trouble: A sudden increase in foul may mean that your children could be carrying around a lot of anger about a recent divorce or illness in the family, for instance, or be upset about something that’s going on at school or in other areas of their life.
If the swearing doesn’t ease up, or if it’s accompanied by aggression or inappropriate sexual behavior, seek professional help.
What to do about swearing
Great Dad Talks
Great Dad Talks is a series of conversations with experts on all aspects of the family adventure. With the perspective that “dads don’t always think like moms,” our mission is to support dad voices and our slightly different approaches to parenting. We’ll try to find solutions to every day challenges like getting kids off the couch and making STEM classes available for both boys and girls. But we’ll also tackle bigger issues when they come. The one main theme will be to support dads in the most important role of their lives that of being a great dad. Connect with us at greatdad.com and watch the video version of these podcasts at YouTube.com/greatdadnews
170. Understanding Emotional Influence in Parenting with Dr. Brian Des Roches
In this episode of Great Dad Talks, I talk with psychotherapist and author Dr. Brian DeRoche (Living a Trigger Free Life) about the neuroscience behind why our kids trigger us and how nervous systems influence each other through co-regulation. Brian explains “emotional influence,” the role of nonverbal cues and facial presence in creating safety, and how repeated disconnection can teach children painful emotional lessons about not mattering.
Whether you’re dealing with tantrums, feeling triggered at home, or just want to connect more deeply with your kids, this interview will give you science-backed guidance for building stronger, happier family bonds.
Check out Brian’s website at www.briandesroches.com
Visit these links and embark on the path to becoming the best parent you can be:
– GreatDad.com/coaching
– GreatDad.com/pq
– Gratitude course: bit.ly/3NMLDNC
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