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Enjoying sex during pregnancy

Author GreatDad Writers
Submitted 04-10-2006

Many dads-to-be ask about sex during pregnancy and whether they can still enjoy intimate moments with their wife. Here are key things you should know:

  1. Sex is usually safe during pregnancy, but check with your doctor. The baby is protected by the amniotic sac and the uterus.  A mucus plug seals the cervix to help keep out infection. You can not hurt the baby unless you are endowed like an elephant, since the penis can not touch the baby during sex. 
  2. Women’s libido varies during the course of the pregnancy, but the  first trimester  is often the lowest given bouts of nausea and fatigue. It’s highest in the second trimester  when discomfort usually ebbs and intimacy is high due to the big event you’re about to share. Quite often, desire often is lower again in the third trimester due to self-consciousness, discomfort and anxiety over childbirth. Since pregnancy brings more blood flow to the vagina and clitoris, many women do feel more aroused during pregnancy and report more intense orgasms.
  3. Pamper your wife and compliment her natural beauty as much as you can to reassure her that you love her. She is naturally vulnerable during pregnancy and everything you can do to make her feel more secure will make her feel more intimate with you. By all means, do not make fun of the changes in her body  or you’ll find yourself sleeping on the couch.
  4. Some men are turned off by the thought of sex with a pregnant woman and find it confusing. If this becomes an obstacle to intimacy, talk to your doctor about it and how you handle these issues. On the other hand, many men are even more turned on by enhanced curves and enlarged breasts of their partners and say they had the best sex of their marriage during pregnancy.
  5. Some positions are more comfortable than others, such as side-by-side, or spoon position, or woman-on-top. Try positions that allow your partner to be in complete control so she can avoid discomfort. Lubrication may be an issue so make sure to suggest a lubricant if dryness is a problem. Oral sex is safe as well, but make sure not to blow into the vagina which could actually be fatal for both mother and baby.
  6. For most pregnancies, sex right up until delivery is not harmful, but check with your doctor. Some will even suggest intercourse to bring on childbirth during the late stages.

As with all aspects of health and pregnancy, check with your doctor on the specifics for your wife and new baby since some pregnancies do fall into higher risk categories where sex would be prohibited. Sex is an important part of your relationship and intimacy, so be open in discussing what works and what doesn’t while appreciating the changes in your partner’s body and new sensitivities.