Most parents want their kids to be honest. But many kids already know how to tell a lie by the time they are 4 years old. And, the fact of the matter is that many parents are teaching, and even encouraging, their kids to lie in some cases.
The most important parenting advice tip for raising an honest child is to avoid being dishonest yourself. Kids see and hear their dads and moms telling "little white lies" all the time. Remember that your child looks to you for guidance on how to act and what to say so it’s necessary for fathers to make an effort to always tell the truth.
One of the reasons many kids tell lies of all sizes is to avoid getting in trouble. According to BabyCenter.com, it’s essential for parents to find out why their kids told the lie in the first place and then talking to them about being truthful instead.
If you catch your child in a lie, talk to him/her about the consequences and avoid punishing them too harshly. "Lying is often treated in a negative way, so a compassionate conversation does more to alter the behavior than anything," said University of California’s Dr Lynn Ponton.
Praising your children when they tell the truth is a great way to encourage honesty, especially if you know your child has gotten away with lies in the past.
As adults we often think a white lie will help a situation / avoid conflict. Our children often see this /learn by example (i.e, the time I negatively RSVPd to an event because we had out of town guests “is Aunt Carol really coming to visit this weekend, mommy?”). It’s a fine line we walk regarding absolutely honesty and sparing someone’s feelings, isn’t it? I have often used my mom’s advice — if you cannot say something nice, don’t say anything at all.
Second, don’t you love it when they do not tell a lie but the answer is not exactly what you want (i.e., did you hit your sister? “Yes!”)? It is always a challenge to figure out how to praise the honesty and punish the behavior. Another fine line.
Parenting is full of them!realparentsrealanswers